Vices

He is currently struggling with his vices. When I ask him what gives him joy, it’s his vices he says. We dive into a deeper conversation and he comes to realize that the vices are just suppressing the pain from his emotions. It’s a difficult question for him to answer what gives him joy then. He remembers then that his daughter was his true joy who was taken away from him many years ago when his Ex left him. He does not have any paternity rights. The incident left him heartbroken. The memory of his daughter being scared of him the last day that they were together because his reaction to the news of his ex leaving hasn’t left him. That’s not how he would have wanted her to remember him. Normally the last day should have been spent making good memories. When I ask him about getting help for his vices, he says that one has to do it for themselves and nobody else and also that one has to be ready for it. He is not ready yet.  I realized he was wise and a good soul despite his vices. As a physician in my earlier years of practicing I had a bias towards people who did drugs. I spoke to a nurse whom I immensely respected who mentioned to me that as a teen she was into drugs and then completely turned her life around. Somehow that day my biases started dissolving and I realized that they weren’t really bad people just caught up in circumstances of life and needed support, love and understanding. I hope we all can maybe give them a ear and a leaning hand when we come across their paths, so that maybe they can start their journeys towards hope and healing.